2010s Road March ranked in order

by Da Face November 15, 2019

For over 87 years we have officially recognised the most popular song on the road for our Carnival activities. The Road March is the song that inspires us to dance and prance in locations previously reserved for 1400kg transportation device while drinking copious amounts of alcohol and doing things that would make our work-clothed selves blush.  If we’re counting unofficial road march winners, it’s been more than a century we’ve been doing the Road March thing. Looking back on the 2010s, it seems like Road March is ever so slightly losing its place in the Carnival zeitgeist; the ten Road March songs of the 2010s are not the top ten songs of the 2010s (coming soon). Nevertheless, we’ve had some strong entries and it would amiss not to create some rabs and build a definitive list. So like Drake, starting from the bottom, here is the ranked list of 2010 Road March songs.

10) Pump Yuh Flag (2012)

Was it the biggest song of that Carnival?: Not even close. That was either Bacchanalist by Kerwin Du Bois or Mr Fete by Machel.

This has to be the most cynical Road March song in history, at least in my history…I not that old yet, only one grey strand in the beard…for now. You have to understand, in 2012 we wasn’t really on power eh. Groovy soca started taking Carnival by storm and we kinda believed that Power Soca was dead. Machel, I imagine, scratched his beard and thought, “Well, it must have Power Soca…so lemme give them something. Here, hold this…Heeey Haaaaa.” There’s nothing really memorable about this song. Actually…nah I doh have anything. It only won because there was literally nothing else.

9) Waiting on the Stage (2016)

Was it the biggest song of that Carnival?: No, that was Cheers to Life by Voice.

Even though it comes in at number 9, it must be said that this song is quite innovative. People real watch it cut eye when it came out because of its strong EDM vibes but the build up is sneakily good. From the time you hear – “Is whole year that we waitinggggg…you know the madness about to start. It won mainly because of weak competition but I see its reputation improving in time to come.

8) Ministry of Road (2014)

Was it the biggest song of that Carnival?: No, that was Too Real by Kerwin.

When we talking about well written songs, this is what we talking bout. In soca you know we love a lazy metaphor. A car bumper is your bottom. You can reverse it, swing the engine, rev the engine, all different ting. The rag you wave can be personified as your best friend. Rum is your lover. Ministry of Road builds on the same template but takes it way further. In sweet T+T, things are setup such that we depend on the government a lot and therefore it always feels like we’re begging for something. Ministry of Road captures this culture perfectly by reframing the situation – Machel is begging for a ministry of road to provide more road to wine and jump on.  It avoids any obvious similes without compromising the wine. It was reasonably well received at the time too; a pretty good song that shone even more with nothing to fight it.

7) Soca Kingdom (2018)

Was it the biggest song of that Carnival?: It was probably in the top 5 but nah, that was Splinters by Shal.

Ok so this is a hard one. I honestly believe that people will appreciate this song way more in time. If we’re just going on the quality of the song,  this is a top tier Road March song.  The problem is, the song itself did not live up to the hype of the artists involved. In reality, I don’t think it ever could. Machel and Super Blue coming together is almost like Sparrow and Kitch doing a collab. Is there any song that can live up to that kinda expectation? If we’re talking beating out the competition, Machel beat out good efforts from Iwer (Savannah) and Patrice (Sweet for days) to take the crown. If we’re talking reception, the song was viewed cynically largely due to Chinese Laundry running the song into the ground for hours straight on his station 96.1, leaving nothing to chance for its acceptance. I think the song has a higher approval now but the tame reception during 2018 is why this song isn’t higher.

 

6) Palance (2011)

Was it the biggest song of that Carnival?: Yes…but….that season was one of the weakest seasons in Carnival history.

The biggest endorsement for this song is that it’s still pumping in fetes nine years later. Any deejay wanting to build a quick vibes can throw it on because the dance is catchy and easy to do. But lewwe be real. Palance would not win Road March in at least 8 of the other 10 years this decade. In 2010 Machel sat out the season and the other more ‘seasoned’ acts did not pick up the slack. JW and Blaze rock back and scope the scene and pulled off the perfect robbery.

However we can’t ignore certain facts. It still holds the record for most plays on the road. It was the biggest song of its season. It still plays today. That is why it’s at number 6.

5) Advantage (2011)

Was it the biggest song of that Carnival?: Maybe. It was between that, Wotless from Kes and Benjai’s Trini.

Oh Advantage, so much controversy. First off, Machel should not have won Soca Monarch that year.  Even at the time, that decision was wrought with controversy. It was rumoured that Machel and the UNC government who was in power at the time had a special connection – they were very buddy buddy and by ‘coincidence’ Kamla upped the prize to two million that year. Suspicions were not helped by the following lyrics:

Leh we thank d govern ment ment ment ment,
they take we off the pave ment ment ment ment
And it was well worth every cent cent cent cent
I say they’re intelligent

At the time, people were vex bad about the Machel winning soca monarch so all and sundry ganged up to hate on the song. But in the end it was too good so we jam to it still and it won anyway.

The win itself is impressive because it was quite a loaded season – it featured the first real arrival from Kes (Wotless), a strong effort from Benjai (Trini) and an engaged and in form Iwer (who was supposed to win Soca Monarch) with Come to Meh. This song can best be described as Big Truck 2.0 aka Big Truck for the Millennials who was still wetting bed when Big Truck came out. The percussion is immaculate. The synths are pretty. The pre-chorus is one of Machel’s best. It has aged wonderfully. But at the time it wasn’t unanimously accepted so we have to place it at number five.

4) Fantastic Friday (2013))

Was it the biggest song of that Carnival?: Arguably yes. Other close contenders were Differentology by Bunji and Fog by Machel.

When it comes to Super Blue and certain things, if you know you know. It’s no secret he’s had vicious battles with drug abuse. It got so bad he was basically washing cars at one point. To see him return in 2013 to the stage at all was a blessing. The fact that he returned with a song that was awesome melodically and lyrically was a gift from the heavens and we were perfectly happy to rally behind that feel good story. Just watch his soca monarch winning performance; Super Blue didn’t even sing and the crowd was like animals outta the cage (word to Arouca church). Admittedly the competition was pretty weak; we still wasn’t on Power and an absolute floater from Machel (Float) was the only challenge. But this song is one of Blue’s finest creations and when you consider he holds Road March titles from the early eighties, that is saying a lot.

 

3) Full Extreme (2017)

Was it the biggest song of that Carnival?: Yes

Full Extreme is definitely the most hashtag-able song on the list. #wejammingstill took Trinidad by storm so much so that I believe some of you don’t even know that “Jamming Still” is not the name of the song. It was without a doubt the largest song for Carnival 2017. There were memes. The phrase “we jamming still” took on a life of its own. MX Prime (also Maximus and Magga Dan for the older ones), the lead singer of Ultimate Rejects, famously did not even want to enter the song in the Road March competition but eventually did so due to public outcry. People literally begged for this song to be considered for Road March. I don’t think this has ever happened.

So why is this not number one? Whyyyy? Well. Simply put (drumroll)) it was toots as a road song. If you feel ah lie…ask any masquarader. It was a great song with a clever phrase that perfectly captured the zeitgeist of the season but ultimately couldn’t perform on the greatest stage. It benefitted heavily from having no competition on the road. If it went up against the following two songs it still would have been favoured in fetes; but you see when the wining start? Curtains I tell you.

 

2) Famalay (2019)

Was it the biggest song of that Carnival?: Tied for second with Savannah Grass (Kes but behind Run Wid It from Mr Killa.

Famalay is a great song, one of the best Road March songs of all time. The beat, heavily influenced by the Bouyon stylings native to Dominica is a thing of beauty. It is relentless – it catches you from the intro and builds till it flattens you on the chorus. The verses delivered in a ragga soca style by the respective lyrical gods of Trinidad and St Vincent (Bunji and Skinny Fabulous) should be printed on gold tablets and stored inside a vacuum under heavy guard at the National Museum.

I mean, Bunji and Skinny absolutely murder the beat. They find more pockets to flow on than a Michael Jackson jacket – just check out the second verse where Skinny Fabulous shreds the beat with a furious string of syllables which leads into and contrasts with Bunji, who comes in laidback, absolutely floating on the beat. And Machel is like the sixth man off the bench, he does the small essential things to make the song shine. He adds hype to the chorus (his low harmony on the call on response “jumping up together” is underrated), drops some well placed “huys” here and there…just sets up everything to let Skinny and the Viking shine.

So why is it not number one? Well real being real, this song seems to be more defined by the song that didn’t win. Savannah Grass is similarly a classic song and would have won 8 out of the 10 years this decade. There definitely is an alternate universe where Savannah Grass won. The best thing we can say is that Famalay faced the stiffest competition of any Road March song this decade and won. But unlike the number one song, that win was not a foregone conclusion.

 

1) Like A Boss (2015)

Was it the biggest song of that Carnival?: Ola by Olatunji was slightly bigger at the start but overall I would give the slight edge to Like A Boss.

With soca, a lot of songs need to grow on you. Since most soca songs center around a festival or experience, you need to be in a party setting to really identify with what you’re hearing. You can’t just be on work, earbuds on and “wine on something” (especially not your female boss you marking a while now). You can’t take a “shot ah hennesy” in traffic on your way to work. You can’t “mash up and buy back” a pew when you hear that new Problem Child from the car drowning out the priest in church. Like a Boss however, is that rare exception.

From the build up into “look trouble now”, I knew this song was Road March. I didn’t need to hear anymore. In fact, after just hearing the intro I actually said to myself “this is Road March”, closed the  YouTube window and went on my merry way not wanting to hear too much of the song before the fete season started. The much touted brass was just icing on the cake…and if that brass is icing you know the cake is something else. People who ignored soca for years were seduced back into the fold Pied Piper-style with the brass. The 25/8 feters like me beat our chest with pride to the following line: “Everyday is fete, I come out tuh fete, ah bet, ah fete-in’ more than you!”. It was sung drunkenly in many faces. Real ‘boulders’.

Like A Boss was unanimously accepted and celebrated during the season and steamrolled to victory without complaint, controversy or surprise. It was one of those rare seasons where the Soca Mafia wasn’t mentioned… maybe they took a year off? The song was big in fetes, injecting some all inclusives with a little cooler fete juice, and was huge on the road as well. Machel listened to the public and pumped even more brass into the Road Mix to the delight of feters.

There is only one argument against this song, the competition in 20015 was weak. Not as weak as 2010 but weak none the less. But I believe that to be circumstantial because if you line up every other song this decade and put them on the road against Like A Boss …who eh dead leaving badly wounded.

Check out my Apple Music playlist of all the road march winning songs of the last twenty years. And let me know your thoughts in the comments. Feel free to make your own list and drop it in the comments too.